|About the Book|
Its been over ten years since Big was killed. I grieved for him for a very long time. And then, as time passed, the icy wall of grief surrounding my heart began to thaw and I began to heal. I remarried, had more children, and continued to record andMoreIts been over ten years since Big was killed. I grieved for him for a very long time. And then, as time passed, the icy wall of grief surrounding my heart began to thaw and I began to heal. I remarried, had more children, and continued to record and release more music. I continued to live my life. And while I can never discount the time I spent with Big, Ive never felt the need to live in the past.But sometimes, I still find myself thinking about Big being rushed the hospital, and I break down in tears.Its not just because we hung up on each other during what would be our last telephone conversation. And its not because I am raising our son, a young man who has never known his father.Its partly all of those things. But mainly its because he wasnt ready to go. His debut album was called Ready to Die. But in the end, he wasnt. Big never got a chance to tell his story. Its been left to others to tell it for him. In making the decision to tell my own story, it means that Ive become one of those who can give insight to who Big really was. But I can only speak on what he meant to me.Yet I also want people to understand that although he was a large part of my life, my story doesnt actually begin or end with Bigs death. My journey has been complicated on many levels. And since I am always linked to Big, there are a lot of misconceptions about who I really am.I hope that in reading my words, there is inspiration to be found. Perhaps you can duplicate my success or achieve where I have failed. Maybe you can skip over the mistakes Ive made. Use my life as an example-of what to do and in some cases, what not to do.Its not easy putting your life out there for the masses. But Ive decided Ill tell my own story. For Big. For my children. And for myself.